Thursday, January 9, 2014

"How to live like a king for very little"

Over the last year or so people have been asking me where the cheapest places to retire are.
Do I look like I should know about retirement? Do I answer the phone 'Concierge'?

Actually a lot of wealth managers are taking a page from Family Offices and offering yacht buying and other Devil Wears Prada gofer services (in lieu of alpha) but I don't know whether Costa Rica is more attractive than Cambodia as to the quality of gardeners or cooks or what will happen to the price of Portuguese retirement villas.

From The Daily Dot:
1.  DON’T SMOKE CIGARETTES.

2.  DRIVE OLD JAPANESE CARS. EASY AND CHEAP TO FIX & THEY RUN FOR FUCKING EVER.

3.  BUY MOST OF YOUR GROCERIES FROM THE PRODUCE SECTION. MOST OF THAT OTHER SHIT IS NOT ACTUALLY FOOD. YOU DON’T NEED IT.

4.  RIDE YOUR BIKE INSTEAD OF DRIVING AS MUCH AS YOU CAN. YOU NEED THE EXERCISE AND GAS IS EXPENSIVE.

5.  DON’T HAVE KIDS. THEY’RE NOT MIRACLES, THEY’RE PEOPLE. 7 BILLION IS TOO FUCKING MANY. FIND SOME OTHER WAY TO GIVE YOUR DULL EXISTENCE SOME MEANING. BTW THEY’RE EXPENSIVE.

6. GET YOUR CLOTHES FROM THRIFT STORES. WITH THE PHYSIQUE YOU’LL HAVE FROM RIDING YOUR BIKE, YOU’LL LOOK HOT WEARING ANYTHING.

7.  LEARN TO FIX THINGS. TONS OF GREAT BOOKS AND YOUTUBE VIDS ON FIXING ANYTHING. OR ASK AN OLD DUDE. PEOPLE USED TO FIX THINGS. NO SHIT.

8.  LEARN A TRADE – CARPENTRY, PLUMBING, ELECTRICAL, AUTO MECHANICS, TAILORING, COMPUTER/ELECTRONICS REPAIR, SOMETHING THEY CAN’T FUCKING OUTSOURCE. NO ONE GIVES A SHIT ABOUT YOUR MASTERS IN DOSTOYEVSKY…. FIX SOMETHING, DUMBASS, FIX SOMETHING!...
...MUCH MORE 

That last point was also made by Gerald Loeb in his 1935 gem "Your Battle for Investment Survival" where he also stresses the need to diversify your friendships across continents should the worst happen in your part of the world.

Now, what show did Monsieur wish tickets for?